Isn't She Beautiful?

Treasure will be 14 years old this June. Several years ago I began to notice subtle changes in her behavior. As the changes became more obvious I contemplated writing a new blog to share and document what was taking place.  Because life happens and time passes by too quickly that just never did happen. 

I know beyond a shadow of doubt that my time with this beautiful Brittany is winding down. She still sleeps with me and sometimes I check to see if she is all right and if I can feel her breathing. As I reach I am aware of the primal scream of denial residing deep in my soul. When I try to squelch the anguish my stomach rolls slightly and I realize I am close to succumbing to silent, powerful, waves of wailing and grief despite relief that she is fine. I truly hope and pray that we have many more days together yet I am preparing my heart well in advance.

Treasure is aging rapidly. The canine cognitive dysfunction (CCD or doggy dementia) progresses. She has good days and bad days.  Mornings are her happiest time of day.  Towards the end of the day Treasure often becomes confused, paces, and appears to be lost. Not every day and not all the time. But more often than not. Senior dogs have unique needs, require much patience, gentleness, kindness and above all love.  They deserve also to be loved for the dog that is in front of us at the moment, not only for the dog they once were. Such as it is with Treasure.

I have known loss in my life. I have experienced the deep grief and loss that results from the death of both parents.  My dad died when I was 11. My mom when I was an adult. Other beloved family and friends have passed on through the years, deaths that had to be accepted regardless of age or reason, tragic or naturally. (Just a little over a year ago I was faced with the possibility of losing my husband due to a heart attack. I thank God he has fully recovered.)  

There have also been animals who were part of my life too that I have grieved over. I know that the Bible teaches in Psalm 30 that weeping may last for a night but joy comes in the morning. I know that the day will come when the Lord will wash every tear away. And I know because of Jesus' life, death, and resurrection that death has been swallowed up in victory. These things I know, trust, believe and confidently consider them regarding my family, friends, and All Things Brittany as well.

Multiple opinions are expressed through articles about the human animal bond. Sometimes the relationships are mocked. Other times  exaggerated to the point of humanizing beloved animals. I'm no fan of extreme anthropomorphizing but I am confident of the unique connection, the understanding, and the deep love that exists between my husband and our Brittany dogs. I'm not a dog mom and they are not my kids. But oh, my dogs most definitely ARE family! 

And as much as I love the uniqueness of each individual Brittany dog we're blessed to share our life with, there are those who for one reason or another I connect with more. This is not to say one dog is better than the other or loved more.  I love absolutely everything about Brittanys because they are so highly intelligent, funny, personable, loving, agile and easy to train to name a very few.  They have shared my heart and my home since 1986. (Many of you are familiar with our story.) They can at times be challenging, stubborn, disobedient, frustrating and difficult. But the most difficult part of all of owning a Brittany is the day your journey together comes to an end and you have to say goodbye. But I am not ready to say goodbye to Treasure, my beautiful liver and white heart dog.

I'm not sure a dog will 'tell you' anything about when they are ready.  Indeed my experience has been anything but.  Because they love us so much, they are so tuned into us and very aware of how much we love and cherish their companionship. I have seen dogs in pain that were so stoic, still wagging their tail and acting so happy simply because it pleased us.  Yet these same dogs could hardly physically move, had lost control of bowels and bladder. They absolutely do NOT tell us when they are ready. In fact they are very good at faking it. No. We have to know and we need to be the one to decide when. (I understand there are unique situations)

I leave you with this link to THE GOOD DEATH. My friend Karra posted this to her Facebook page the other day.  A timely read, easy to relate to and one that has totally blessed me. Treasure and I will cherish each precious day that God gives us to be together. His love and guidance will help me with the hard decision. And I will pray for many, many more happy and healthy days together with my beautiful Treasure!

God bless you,
Ann